The Emotional Roller Coaster of Facing Foreclosure and Keeping your Cool while Navigating the Loan Modification Process. By: Anna Cuevas, A Loan Mod Guru
One in every 7 homeowners is facing foreclosures the numbers of people in crisis are at epic proportions in 2009 and growing, unfortunately most of the reports only deal with the implications on the lenders and the help is slowly trickling in. The lenders were not prepared to deal with the kind of numbers of loan modification requests coming in and have had to ramp up and train staff just to try to catch up. A handful are doing a good job and the others unfortunately are still navigating through the crisis at a snails pace and cannot keep up with the sometimes weekly changes in systems and guidelines. For the employees at the lender it is a different kind of stress and issues of workload that sometimes gives you a less than pleasant person to deal with on the other end of the line. You must put this all into perspective for you to avoid frustration and add to your own stress with giving other peoples attitudes too much importance. It is important to get prepared and dig deep inside to find patience if one is to venture into trying to save your home and do it yourself as recommended by the government, and the lenders. The collapsing housing market offers tremendous stress and uncertainty for many and many psychologists warn foreclosures take a deep emotional toll on people and families as well. If you are going through this you will know what they are talking about.
Your home carries a sentimental attachment that brings a complex sense of loss and emotional roller coaster for many people when faced with the thought of foreclosure. People don’t just live in a house they consider it a home filled with memories, friends, community and familiarity. When faced with losing your home all of these feelings and emotions get triggered and surface, and you may say or do things you will later regret. Thats why it is important to prepare yourself mentally to be able to navigate the foreclosure and loan modification process without losing your cool.
Foreclosure strikes a deep chord in our financial security and can bring up many wounds and issues of deep stress, isolation, rejection and abandonment for families. Losing a home and being forced to move means there has been a breach in financial security and that’s very scary. It is important to deal with the emotional side of things when faced with the huge stress of working on saving your home so that you can come out of this experience stronger and with your health in tact.
1. You Must Acknowledge your feelings and keep your stress level under control.
Make sure you don’t suppress your emotions, so that a negative pileup or blowup does not occur or affect your health. Talk to a good friend or use another form of creative outlet such as journaling or drawing to express your feelings.
2. Avoid connecting negative thoughts to your feelings.
Focus on positive productive thinking instead of regrets. Don’t think “I am a bad person for letting this happen,” instead its best to think, “this is a bad experience, but I am going to focus and be determined to work hard to remedy the situation.”
We need to have a good vision and plan of your desired outcome so that you can navigate the obstacles and frustrations that come with working on a loan modification so you can be successful. Henry Ford said “Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal”. The art of achieving small daily goals begins with setting them and coming up with a plan and this is essential to building your confidence and having a positive outlook towards your future.
You must expose yourself to positive thoughts many times throughout every day. The mind is very strong and we rarely realize its full potential. Positive thoughts create energy while negative thoughts destroy energy. Read inspirational stories. Only listen to positive news and refuse to allow the negative news into your thinking, listen instead to the positive. Utilize affirmations. Make a list of everything that you are thankful for and read it regularly. We all have a choice of how we focus our energy focus it on what you do want not on what you do not want to occur. Energy flows where attention goes.
3. Live in the NOW.
While we need to learn from the past and plan for the future. It is a waste of time and energy to have anxiety over things we ultimately no longer have control over. We can use the past as a learning tool to avoid repeating the same mistakes, but there is absolutely no value in second guessing our past decisions or blaming ourselves. Do not dwell on the past. In addition, neither is spending too much time worrying about the future. You can be more productive with your time in the present as it is the only thing we can control. Take it one day at a time facing each new situation as it comes and applying the lessons you have learned to today’s situations. It is important for you to set your goals and work daily and without getting frustrated in that direction to get them accomplished. If you have the confidence that you are doing the best you can and moving forward you can have a positive attitude towards everything you do, it will and does make a difference in every situation.
4. Strengthen your family.
Let your kids and family know that you are doing everything in your power to remain in your home and at the same time assure them that any decisions you need to make will be the right ones for your family even if it includes moving. It is better that you speak with your family without causing fear. At the same time when they see you giving it your all and not giving up it will teach everyone a valuable lesson of determination and strength regardless of the outcome.
5. It is ok to ask for help.
It is not a sign of weakness but an act of strength to recognize you need help and for you to seek and ask for help whether it be simply to talk to someone to get a new perspective and renew your strength or you need to work on some anxiety reducing excercise. Whether it is from a financial counselor or a mental health advisor, if you think you are in over your head, seek out assistance. We all need a little help sometimes.
6. Consider Activities that promote inner peace such as meditation and yoga.
Daily life may often cause lots of turmoil in your mind and emotions. Stress with your job, your family and political or economical situation of your surroundings of your life may cause lots of anxiety, fears, emotions and thoughts, acting like a storm inside you.
- empty your mind to become ready for pure consciousness
- empty your emotions to become aware of your surroundings emotions
- relief all your stress and emotional and / or mental pressure
- create peace of mind and harmony within yourself
- replace your emotional or mental turmoil by something positively and actively sacred and Divine
In the end, remember that the most important things in life are your health, happiness and family and none of these are worth compromising. The worst thing you can do is nothing. Only determination, faith, hard work and mental strength will help you be successful.
Knowledge is power. Empower yourself today. About the author Anna Cuevas
Consumer Advocate and Expert Trainer for Mindset & Empowerment has used her knowledge to Successfully Modify Mortgages & SAVE Homes. As a Loan Mod Guru her mission is to:
To empower people w/knowledge & help them be their very best. My 23+ yrs. of experience which includes vast insider knowledge and expertise enables me to empower people & reduce frustration during negotiations & loan modification process with their bank. Proven Record of Achievement: Modified over 110 loans including Sale Reversals. My expertise can empower others during the housing crisis w/insider tips, process, & knowledge. Extremely Resourceful. Trustworthy. Dedicated, Expert Reputation of Going Above & Beyond whats required.
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